Just things

 Sometimes I find in a place in my house that is cozy and I just want to stay and curl up. This has been my bed lately. The kidney stopped hurting two days before thanksgiving. Quite suddenly and after many calls to my doctor and I found myself pain free. The pain started August 6th after trampolining with Axel. It intensified October 14, the day I was supposed to go see the Giants post-season game but instead went to the ER. After the surgery, dr cooney said the stone was too hard to bust up with the lithotripsy. And then 6 days post op, pain gone. Tomorrow I get a CT. And either closure or reopener. We’ll see. Until then I will be in my bed. Mostly.

 Ugh, kidney hurts. I just want this to stop. Surgeon told me yesterday that the stone was too hard and was not broken up much. I would like to dissolve it with my mind. I am trying to pretend there is no pain.

 Pain free today, post-operatively. Unfortunately Dr. Cooney said the stone was very hard and would not break up very easily and that it is probably still there, albeit smaller. I am on a mission to reduce oxalate in my diet and consume apple cider vinegar daily. On December 18th(ish) I should have a follow-up where we look at an x-ray and see where we are at. The experience at the OR in Mercy San Juan hospital was like this: I arrived and was gowned up. The anesthesiologist, Dr. Maloney, gave me an anti-anxiety drug that made my face tingle and then put a mask over my face. He said it would take 10 seconds and counted down. I remember nothing after 9 seconds. I woke up with a sore throat but otherwise feeling fine. I now get to strain all my pee for stone fragments and take flomax for a month. Fun. Surprisingly, after getting home at noon, I managed to put in 8 hours of work and was back at work today also. This is good because I get 16 hours of paid time off back in the bank. I a...

 I am sitting the lobby of the NE Sac Crowne Plaza Hotel. Never go here, btw. Paper thin walls, internet not working, lamp broken, sad. But, no matter. Hopefully I never need to be within a close Lyft of the Mercy San Juan Hospital again. Today is surgery day and I am Ready to have this over with. Two months I have been waiting. Good habits are at an 18 month low, at least. My move and activity goals haven’t been met in so long, if an app could gather dust, my activity app would be coated in it. Too many opiates. I am resolved to tough it out as much as possible with Tylenol and get back on the walking and yoga and Pilates train as soon as possible.

I woke up early for the first time in a long time, good because I must wake up even earlier tomorrow. Tomorrow is my kidney surgery, or, more technically, my extracorporeal shock wave lithotripsy.  Since first hearing that I had a 11mm kidney stone I thought, "oh they will just do the thing where they break it up with sound waves." And when the doctor called it a surgery I thought, "surely it's more of a 'procedure' than a 'surgery'." Now I have had time to marinate and web search and anticipate, I've come around fully to the "I am about to have surgery on my right kidney" camp. I have been told by my mom that I will pee actual blood rather than the trace amounts that have been continually detected since this hunk of cement was discovered. I have been informed the kidney will be traumatized and I will need lots of rest. I discovered that, because of 4/3(pie)r cubed, my previous 5mm stone is nothing compared to an 11mm stone. All the...